How often does it happen that you are suddenly confronted out of the blue with an issue for which you were not prepared. Be it with a neighbour, a client, a co-worker, a boss, a partner, a friend, parents, a dismissal, etc.

What happens in this moment of confrontation?

Often an accusation is made here, which with a lot of emotional underlining illustrates the point of view of the confronting party, without the point of view of the accused having been heard beforehand. This is brilliantly inflammatory and will definitely lead to a shambles.

What can I do?

Every person has built up his or her own context in the course of life and it is important to preserve and respect this. Communication can create a basis for a common understanding of language, which is crucial for the further course of the negotiation.

Conflicts arise and are also very important as feedback for further development. Ignorance is certainly not a solution here. In order to get into a productive phase, inner calmness and the willingness (openness) for a discussion is essential for both persons/parties involved. It may make sense to postpone such a discussion until the next day so you won’t run into an emotional blockage. In this way, a discourse can be held where even incursions into emotional holes can be resolved constructively. The accumulated problems should be interpreted objectively and benevolently and in the best case lead to a win-win situation. Looking ahead supports the process of finding solutions rather than looking back.

Based on my experience, it can be deduced that with this mindset, conflict potentials can be reduced before they arise.

What are your experiences with confrontations? I look forward to your feedback in the comments.

Many thanks & best regards

Stephan